Halloween Rules -- Learn Them


Here are some helpful safety hints..... Please learn from them!!! With
Halloween upon us, it is worthwhile to remember a few simple rules to help
keep this season healthy, happy and SAFE!! Please use these helpful hints
this, and every year...

1. When it appears that you have killed the monster, NEVER check to see if
it's really dead.

2. Never read a book of demon summoning aloud, even as a joke.

3. Do not search the basement, especially if the power has gone out.

4. If your children speak to you in Latin or any other language which they
should not know, shoot them immediately. It will save you a lot of grief in
the long run. However, it will probably take several rounds to kill them,
so be prepared. This also applies to kids who speak with somebody else's
voice.

5. When you have the benefit of numbers, NEVER pair off and go alone.

6. As a general rule, don't solve puzzles that open portals to Hell.

7. Never stand in, on, or above a grave, tomb, or crypt. This would apply
to any other house of the dead as well.

8. If you're searching for something which caused a loud noise and find out
that it's just the cat, GET THE HELL OUT!

9. If appliances start operating by themselves, do not check for short
circuits; just get out.

10. Do not take ANYTHING from the dead.

11. If you find a town which looks deserted, there's probably a good reason
for it. Don't stop and look around.

12. Don't fool with recombinant DNA technology unless you're sure you know
what you're doing.

13. If you're running from the monster, expect to trip or fall down at
least twice, more if you are female. Also note that, despite the fact that
you are running and the monster is merely shambling along, it's still
moving fast enough to catch up with you.

14. If your companions suddenly begin to exhibit uncharacteristic behavior
such as hissing, fascination for blood, glowing eyes, increasing hairiness,
and so on, kill them immediately.

15. Stay away from certain geographical locations, some of which are listed
here: Amityville, Elm Street, Transylvania, Nilbog (you're in trouble if
you recognize this one), anywhere in Texas where chainsaws are sold, the
Bermuda Triangle, or any small town in Maine.

16. If your car runs out of gas at night on a lonely road, do not go to the
nearby deserted-looking house to phone for help. If you think that it is
strange you ran out of gas because you thought you had most of a tank,
shoot yourself instead. You are going to die anyway, and most likely be
eaten.

17. Beware of strangers bearing tools. For example: chainsaws, staple guns,
hedge trimmers, electric carving knives, combines, lawnmowers, butane
torches, soldering irons, band saws, or any devices made from deceased
companions.

18. If you find that your house is built upon a cemetery, now is the time
to move in with the in-laws. This also applies to houses that had previous
inhabitants who went mad or committed suicide or died in some horrible
fashion, or had inhabitants who performed satanic practices.

19. Dress appropriately. When investigating a noise downstairs in an old
house, women should not wear a flimsy negligee. And carry a flashlight, not
a candle.

20. Do not mention the names of demons around open flames, as these can
flare suddenly. Be especially careful of fireplaces in this regard.

21. Do not go looking for witches in the Maryland countryside.

HAVE A SAFE AND HAPPY HALLOWEEN!!

 

Another tip:
This is not a costume:


[Hoss]

 

What a handsome young fellow that Hoss is. Nice hat too. ;D

 

Thankfully you had the right hat on. You going to the game this weekend?

 

I'm wearing the same hat now....although it's showing a little wear.

Possibly....I'm trying to get some tickets. Haven't been to a home game yet this year so I'd like to catch this one since I probably won't be able to make the t.u. game.

 

Here is a picture of Hoss in his halloween costume

 

Thats not a costume Lary




[quote author=Lary Ellis (Top) link=board=10;threadid=21723;start=0#msg203545 date=1067531227]
Here is a picture of Hoss in his halloween costume
[/quote]

 

I thought this was Hass in his costume?

Hoss and the Preaching Bunny costume


Rich

 

Dang, that scared me!

MikeyB

 

Dave, that is a great reminder. DTR's, take a good look at what NWDave has posted. It may look like a joke but underneath that there is some very serious stuff. Too serious for me to expound on here but if anybody is curious, PM me or Dave. Parents in particular, take note.
Thanks Dave.

 

LMAO @ Lary! That's bad!

Tomorrow is like Christmas for me Yippeeeeee...

 

Great....Stan is at it again. : :P

 

[quote author=Jack Thorpe link=board=10;threadid=21723;start=0#msg203669 date=1067550069]
okay, you two have lost me once again.
[/quote]

Whew, I thought it was just me!
You guys got me lost as well.

Rich

 

Hoss, you want to explain it to them?