ethics question?
#16
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Hey Top
I just want it to be known, you can use my truck anytime and this weekend would be perfect for a wash and fill. I meant to say if you need an extra truck for anything
I just want it to be known, you can use my truck anytime and this weekend would be perfect for a wash and fill. I meant to say if you need an extra truck for anything
#17
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Originally Posted by Lary Ellis (Top)
It all comes down to how much value you place on your friend. If it were me I would fill his tank and forget about it, then the next time he wants you to do something to his truck, tell him it will cost him some fuel
My point is square it up right away so you don't have any issues between you. Friends and money don't mix, so keep everything upfront and out in the open that way you don't lose a friend
I borrowed my Bro in laws truck for a week when I had some tranny issues. He brought it over and parked it in my driveway for a week and I NEVER drove it.
I returned it to him the next week with a full tank and a fresh wash job even though I never used it. I value him and his kind effort enough to feel I owed him even if I did not drive his truck.
Thats just the kind of guy I am, you need to decide what is right for you
My point is square it up right away so you don't have any issues between you. Friends and money don't mix, so keep everything upfront and out in the open that way you don't lose a friend
I borrowed my Bro in laws truck for a week when I had some tranny issues. He brought it over and parked it in my driveway for a week and I NEVER drove it.
I returned it to him the next week with a full tank and a fresh wash job even though I never used it. I value him and his kind effort enough to feel I owed him even if I did not drive his truck.
Thats just the kind of guy I am, you need to decide what is right for you
#18
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Originally Posted by getblown5.9
in our group everyone helps everyone for free...I OFFERED THE HALF TANK OF FUEL and he told me to wait until he is on E then i can fill it. well tough cow manure, you get half a tank now or none. ive spent so many counless hours helping friends, him in particualr, on his jeep and truck. yet when i had to put a DD and tranny in my truck i worked with my father only, i pulled the head by myself, and i will for sure install it alone. they dont come to help me. so maybe im way too nice as well. but ive learned this lesson-friends come and go, they wont always be there for you no matter how much you do for them. the only true friend i have is my own father, cuz he has always been there.
#19
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Originally Posted by getblown5.9
in our group everyone helps everyone for free...I OFFERED THE HALF TANK OF FUEL and he told me to wait until he is on E then i can fill it. well tough cow manure, you get half a tank now or none. ive spent so many counless hours helping friends, him in particualr, on his jeep and truck. yet when i had to put a DD and tranny in my truck i worked with my father only, i pulled the head by myself, and i will for sure install it alone. they dont come to help me. so maybe im way too nice as well. but ive learned this lesson-friends come and go, they wont always be there for you no matter how much you do for them. the only true friend i have is my own father, cuz he has always been there.
dieselfan
#20
Originally Posted by PanteraGSTK
My roommate is just like you. We installed a lift on our friend's brother's rubicon in about a day and a half. We were promised a 30 pack of bud light and got nothing. Then we helped his brother move a Big screen for free and got a free shirt each . Oh well, if it wasn't my friend's brother whom we diddn't know that well it would have been different.
Castration. Castration with a brick.
Paying beer for work is sacred.
#21
For me, each friend is different. I love them dearly all the same, but I cannot do or treat them the same. I cannot travel with some for any period of time, we get on each others nerves. I cannot ride my bike with others because they get too competetive. I don't ask favors of some because I know they will do what I ask, but not very willingly. You just learned something new about your friend. Pay the tank, move on, but when it comes to asking for favors, be aware.
#22
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Me and my best friend...I can't tell you how much stuff we've traded, money paid for things I've bought from him and he from me. "I'll get it to you...." and that's how it is. Heck, for all I know I owe him money or he owes me...we honestly could not tell you if we did. Keep it simple, anything we sell/trade to each other is kept simple. Found some 15" goodyears today at work, in good shape, thought of his bronco. Called him, he said how much, I said, $40 he said ok. He texted me back and asked if I would like some John Deere mudflaps, I said, "how much?" He texted me back and said, " buy two tires, get two for some JD mudflaps" I said, OK. Tires were free, I'd say since he is involved with JD's that the mudflaps were free to. Plain and simple, he's happy and so am I. Can't beat true good friends.....
#23
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I am the same way getblown5.9. I will always help people out, but when it comes time for me needing a extra hand, noone to be found. I can only take so much and with this guy I was at my wits end.
short story
I will start by saying this guy loves to get plowed and then try tussling with me. I am bigger and younger, but blow it off not my style. one night I think he blacked out and start crap with me, wouldn't stop. SO I held him on the ground with knee placed in his brisket for, oh a good 5 minutes until he would respond that he was done. (shorten this part a but). Anyway, ended up separating his pec muscle. he apologized up and down the nest day, he was pretty banged up and didn't remember a 1/4 of it. leading into the rest.
Year later, he is having a reception party, I take a day off work, leave at 3 am, 450 miles away to help with setup. (75 plus people going to be there) I get there, he pulls up and asks me if I will mow his pasture, cause he had a ton of crap to do(should have done this days ago), sure, no prob. It took me 3 hours to do, the whole time he is drinking beer on the porch BSing. I was not happy, after that I did countless thing, tents, chairs, table, kids pool, slipn slide, etc. I decided to grab one of the other guys there early the next morning, just to get out of there and play 9 holes. of course he wants to go. "don't you have stuff to do?" Ah it can wait. I am thinkin what a *%*%&^%. we get back, he has to program his play list in the Ipod. WHAT? meanwhile me and another guy continue setting up. the next thing I know he says, "oh yeah my cook can't make it, do you mind cooking the chicken?" 75 people???? ok, ok. that night he started his shenanigans, I just about beat the living you know out of him. but kept my cool walked away and went to bed. next morning "i need help cleaning up" Nope need to leave, long drive. the whole time he is saying how great and helpful his neighbors and carrying on. I am thinking to myself well where the &(&*^&* are they then if they are so great? He NEVER told me thank-you or anything. my wife was so ******, I just blew it off and said I am done with that pile of dung, hope I never see him again, it might not turn out so good.
It is my wife's old best friend from highschool husband. She agrees. I guess my point is that some people will, take and take and take if you let them. I let them, but I definitely learned something for this. Just food for thought.
sorry for so long, just ticked me off to all ends.
short story
I will start by saying this guy loves to get plowed and then try tussling with me. I am bigger and younger, but blow it off not my style. one night I think he blacked out and start crap with me, wouldn't stop. SO I held him on the ground with knee placed in his brisket for, oh a good 5 minutes until he would respond that he was done. (shorten this part a but). Anyway, ended up separating his pec muscle. he apologized up and down the nest day, he was pretty banged up and didn't remember a 1/4 of it. leading into the rest.
Year later, he is having a reception party, I take a day off work, leave at 3 am, 450 miles away to help with setup. (75 plus people going to be there) I get there, he pulls up and asks me if I will mow his pasture, cause he had a ton of crap to do(should have done this days ago), sure, no prob. It took me 3 hours to do, the whole time he is drinking beer on the porch BSing. I was not happy, after that I did countless thing, tents, chairs, table, kids pool, slipn slide, etc. I decided to grab one of the other guys there early the next morning, just to get out of there and play 9 holes. of course he wants to go. "don't you have stuff to do?" Ah it can wait. I am thinkin what a *%*%&^%. we get back, he has to program his play list in the Ipod. WHAT? meanwhile me and another guy continue setting up. the next thing I know he says, "oh yeah my cook can't make it, do you mind cooking the chicken?" 75 people???? ok, ok. that night he started his shenanigans, I just about beat the living you know out of him. but kept my cool walked away and went to bed. next morning "i need help cleaning up" Nope need to leave, long drive. the whole time he is saying how great and helpful his neighbors and carrying on. I am thinking to myself well where the &(&*^&* are they then if they are so great? He NEVER told me thank-you or anything. my wife was so ******, I just blew it off and said I am done with that pile of dung, hope I never see him again, it might not turn out so good.
It is my wife's old best friend from highschool husband. She agrees. I guess my point is that some people will, take and take and take if you let them. I let them, but I definitely learned something for this. Just food for thought.
sorry for so long, just ticked me off to all ends.
#24
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Originally Posted by Jezzhuntin
I will start by saying this guy loves to get plowed and then try tussling with me.
Getblown - I personally would call him on it. Tell him look, you volunteered to drive and I promised to fill your truck up when we get back, not a full fill up. If he doesn't understand, fill the entire tank up and be done with him. Its that simple. Either he is trying to get one over on you or he is just misunderstanding what he is asking you to do (which I doubt). Life is too short to deal with friends that are trying to always get one up on you.
Here is an example. I tend to be a very generous person. I will drop whatever to help a friend out and when we have group rides or campouts, any food or beer that I have is shared with everyone. I wasn't raised to hoard things from friends. Anyway, we were on a guys atv ride a few years ago down in WV. Friday night, we were at the hotel drinking a few beers and having some snacks. As usual, my cooler and snacks were open to all. This one guy that rides with us is a notorious self-admited cheapskate. He was in there as usually drinking my beer and eating my chips. No problem. I am not lowering myself to his game. Next morning, in the hungover daze that I was in, I forgot to take my prilosec and my stomach was rocked. We get out to the trailhead to ride and I need some rolaids bad and I didn't have any. I asked this guy if he had some and he pulls out a 2/3rd so a roll pack and gives it too me, and then says, "You can replace them for me later". I was like, uh, ok. Not two hours later back at the trailhead, he ask if he can have a few bottles of my water. I was like, sure, now we can call the rolaids even. He was like sure. With him though, he has been cheapskate so long, he doesn't even stop to think it. He just assumes that you get nothing for free from him.
Anyway, like I said before. There are too many people in the world trying to get one over on you. You don't need friends that are trying to do the same.
#25
Originally Posted by jazz_kt
Hey Top
I just want it to be known, you can use my truck anytime and this weekend would be perfect for a wash and fill. I meant to say if you need an extra truck for anything
I just want it to be known, you can use my truck anytime and this weekend would be perfect for a wash and fill. I meant to say if you need an extra truck for anything
#26
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I'd figure out about how much fuel you used & hand him the money for it when he gets there. Cash in hand & be done w/ it. I ALWAYS fill up at the last station we pass when we go somewhere together even if it is late. Usually we all split the total unless I invited them to go.
#27
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Originally Posted by Begle1
Somebody promised you beer and they didn't deliver?!?
Castration. Castration with a brick.
Paying beer for work is sacred.
Castration. Castration with a brick.
Paying beer for work is sacred.
#28
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Originally Posted by Lary Ellis (Top)
It all comes down to how much value you place on your friend. If it were me I would fill his tank and forget about it, then the next time he wants you to do something to his truck, tell him it will cost him some fuel
My point is square it up right away so you don't have any issues between you. Friends and money don't mix, so keep everything upfront and out in the open that way you don't lose a friend
I borrowed my Bro in laws truck for a week when I had some tranny issues. He brought it over and parked it in my driveway for a week and I NEVER drove it.
I returned it to him the next week with a full tank and a fresh wash job even though I never used it. I value him and his kind effort enough to feel I owed him even if I did not drive his truck.
Thats just the kind of guy I am, you need to decide what is right for you
My point is square it up right away so you don't have any issues between you. Friends and money don't mix, so keep everything upfront and out in the open that way you don't lose a friend
I borrowed my Bro in laws truck for a week when I had some tranny issues. He brought it over and parked it in my driveway for a week and I NEVER drove it.
I returned it to him the next week with a full tank and a fresh wash job even though I never used it. I value him and his kind effort enough to feel I owed him even if I did not drive his truck.
Thats just the kind of guy I am, you need to decide what is right for you
But I would respond in the way Top says.
If he is serious I would fill his tank and then probably never take help from him again.
If I offered you the help, I would not even let you buy me fuel. I would probably let you buy me lunch.
As someone else said, working for beer is sacred. When welched upon that is a punishable offense, usually involving castration and a brick.
I am like Top also that if I borrow something from you I will return it in better shape than it was when you gave it to me. I borrowed a buddies truck once to haul an engine block when I drove a Z-71 several years ago. It had about a 1/4 tank when I picked it up. When I returned it after driving about 150 miles it had a full tank. I didn't wash it. (It was a farm truck going back into the cow lot that night.)
No ,I don't need to borrow anyone's truck.
Just my .03 cents. (adjusted for inflation)
#29
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Well, it's hard to say for sure..... First off, he may be your best friend and offered to help you out, and did. Then you offered to pay for fuel. He put it off by (teasing), I catch you Sunday when it's empty.
In this case he doesn't expect you to pay and doesn't want you to pay, that's why he put it off.
If he does expect you to pay for an empty tank when you offered to fill it earlier, tells you a lot about your friends character. Pay him and beware of future events. You might make him aware of your services next time he ask you to provide something, but wait to say anything about it until he ask for something.
I never ask anyone to do something they do for a lively hood for me without me paying them their standard fee or more. Other situations are open to tradeouts or whatever.
Here's a quote that eliminates alot of troubles in life. "Don't ever loan money to a friend--until you deside which one is more important to you."
.
In this case he doesn't expect you to pay and doesn't want you to pay, that's why he put it off.
If he does expect you to pay for an empty tank when you offered to fill it earlier, tells you a lot about your friends character. Pay him and beware of future events. You might make him aware of your services next time he ask you to provide something, but wait to say anything about it until he ask for something.
I never ask anyone to do something they do for a lively hood for me without me paying them their standard fee or more. Other situations are open to tradeouts or whatever.
Here's a quote that eliminates alot of troubles in life. "Don't ever loan money to a friend--until you deside which one is more important to you."
.
#30
Registered User
I agree with carczr, in hind-sight (20-20) you could have avoided this situation by stopping at a station near home and topping it off before you got home so that you were done with it but since you didn't, I'd say fill it up for him if he asks you to but then know what kind of "friend" he is and act accordingly in the future.
Personally, I'm never too busy to help a real friend that needs help but very often too busy to help friends that are just there to get and not to give.
Personally, I'm never too busy to help a real friend that needs help but very often too busy to help friends that are just there to get and not to give.