Flashdancr

An Irishman, a Mexican and a blonde guy were doing construction work on scaffolding on the 20th floor of a building. They were eating lunch and the Irishman said, "Corned beef and cabbage! If I get corned beef and cabbage one more time for lunch I'm going to jump off this building." The Mexican opened his lunch box and exclaimed, "Burritos again! If I get burritos one more time I'm going to jump off, too." The blonde opened his lunch and said, "Bologna again. If I get a bologna sandwich one more time I'm jumping too."
The next day the Irishman opened his lunch box, saw corned beef and cabbage and jumped to his death. The Mexican opened his lunch, saw a burrito and jumped too. The blonde opened his lunch, saw the bologna and jumped to his death as well.
At the funeral the Irishman's wife was weeping. She said, "If I'd known how really tired he was of corned beef and cabbage I never would have given it to him again!" The Mexican's wife also wept and said, "I could have given him tacos or enchiladas! I didn't realize he hated burritos so much." Everyone turned and stared at the blonde's wife. Hey, don't look at me," she said, "He makes his own lunch."

Barry Smith

A woman stopped by unannounced at her recently married son's house.
She rang the door bell and walked in she was startled to see her daughter-in-law on the couch naked.
She ask "what are you doing?"
"I'm waiting for my husband to come home from work" the daughter in law answered.
"But you're naked!" mother said
"this is my love dress."
"love dress? But you're naked"
"My husband loves me to wear this dress. He gets so excited and ravages me for hours on end."

The mother in law left.
She got home undressed, showered and laid on the couch waiting for her husband to arrive.
Finally her husband came home. He came in and saw her lying there so provocatively.
"What are you doing?" he ask
"This is my love dress" she said sensuously
"Needs ironing, what's for dinner?"

j-fox

Here is a true story.

A guy down the street from me asks if I can help him jump start his car.
Sure, get cables hooked up and he tells his girl friend-- blonde- to start it.
Just then she put both hands on the steering wheel.
We look at each other and smile. He repeats the command. She yells back that she is trying. Still has two hands on the wheel. His male friend- who is standing next to her- reaches in across her and turns the key.!!!! It starts right up. She hangs her head.!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

wannadiesel

JKM

I don't get it

BigBlue

1st gen Hobie

Hey, if you get a gf like that you know she wont use your truck.

AlK

A Blonde walks into a bank in New York City and asks for the loan officer. She says she’s going to Europe on business for two weeks and needs to borrow $5,000. The bank officer says the bank will need some kind of security for such a loan, so the Blonde hands over the keys to a new Rolls Royce parked on the street in front of the bank.

Everything checks out, and the bank agrees to accept the car as collateral for the loan. An employee drives the Rolls into the bank’s underground garage and parks it there. Two weeks later, the Blonde returns, repays the $5,000 and the interest, which comes to $15.41.

The loan officer says, “We are very happy to have had your business, and this transaction has worked out very nicely, but we are a little puzzled. While you were away, we checked you out and found that you are a multimillionaire. What puzzles us is why would you bother to borrow $5,000?”

The Blonde replied, "Where else in New York can I park my car for two weeks for 15 bucks?"

AlK

A rather well-to-do man was standing on his front veranda contemplating his weekend work ahead of him when he spied a young blonde woman walking up his drive.
“Hey mister, have you got any work that needs doing?”
“Well,” he said ”I’ll give you $50 dollars to paint my porch.”
“Sure”, she said.
He passed her the can of paint and the brush and went inside to tell his wife. She complained that that wasn’t very much money for the size of the job.
“Does she know the veranda goes around both sides of the house?” she asked.
“A deal is a deal,” claimed the titan of industry.
Thirty minutes later there was a knock on the door. The man opened it to see the young woman standing there offering him the paint can and brush back.
“Finished,” she said, “and, mister, that wasn’t a porch, it was a Ferrari.”

tool

A classic.

dssimecek

The blond that thought Taco Bell is the Mexican phone company

Then there was the blond that hinks noodle soup is a brain food.

Two blonds walking down the street. One finds a compact lon the sidewalk,
picks it up and opens it, looks in the mirrors and says, "she looks familiar."
Other blond sez "let me see."
She gets the compact, looks and sez, "of course she looks familar, it's ME."

Flashdancr

This is one of my favorites

A blonde goes to a beauty shop wearing headphones.
She tells the hairdresser, "Cut my hair please, but do not remove the headphones."
The hairdresser does her job but needs to get under the headphones to finish her work. She removes the headphones thinking that the blonde will never even notice. The blonde falls to the floor, chokes, turns blue and dies.
The hairdresser picks up the headphones to see what she was listening to and hears: Breath In, Breath Out, Breath In, Breath Out....

DeaconWayne

Two blondes walked into a building. You'd think one of them would have seen it.

DW